My lack of self-esteem warranted a change of pace and I wasn't getting any younger. I reconsidered what my initial career goal was way WAY back to when I was 15. I wanted so very much to go to modeling school and become a model. Well, I interviewed and was accepted which made me quite happy. That was about the time my health went to hell. Let me tell you, it became really, really bad.
Now, we switch to the present day. What did I love most about the thought of modeling? The answer is the makeup and the clothes. Don't get me wrong, I graduated with more than a 4 year college degree in English, and I am glad I went to college, but the yearning deep inside me to be more than a writer was buried deep inside me. I had to deal with years of listening to both young and old alike ignorant people who were at times just bastards with their ignorant comments. Yes, those include those of you from high school who were cruel (probably not something you intended), but still unforgiveable. There, I finally said it, you guys were absolute jerks to me and you have absolutely no idea how frightened I was even without the comments.
The thing is, I 'm not afraid anymore. That Tammy is gone and has been gone since she was 16 years old. Having been through all I have has taught me more than you know. Oh, enough of that sh@#! it's time to move on! Tally ho!!!
NOW, NO LONGER LOOKING BACK...
I digress (much to my chagrin). The topic is self esteem and how to accomplish getting yourself feeling better - that's the topic from now on.
Next blog will be upbeat and nothing so personal as the above. I just thought it best to let you know why I am taking my time to help those who might feel like an 'ugly duckling' and help them to find their inner Princess, or Goddess. I am still unsure as to which category I fit into. actually I am more the Goddess type ;)
Later, Tammy
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